Bye

The extremity of my snapping sanity,
The shudder at my haunting stupidity,
The disgust at my lack of rationality,
The desperation to escape reality.

I want to run, run far into the dark,
I want to vanish into an undiscovered path,
I want to slip, and fall from an "accidental" cliff,
I want to hide, just hide from it all.

I despise myself,
For all that I did,
I rather delete and,
Erase my breath,
So all will feel,
Peace, Knowing that,
My face is gone,
So no haunting and daunting,
Their every step.

Pray

I have destroyed myself,
Internally and emotionally,
Half the 18 years of my living,
Filled with the biggest regrets of my life.

So stupidly drawn to things so dangerous,
So stupidly believing that I found true love,
So stupidly gave my all,
To end up with absolutely nothing at all.

The demons inside they call out to me,
Anger, Darkness, Lust and Insanity,
"Come child embrace us all,
Let us consume you till you fall."

Like a fish thrown a bait,
I was easily caught,
And the demons inside me,
Governed my actions and thoughts.

I ruined myself,
Mind, body and soul,
Excruciating regret fills my bones
Fearing I'll never be able to save my soul.

Now I am thrown into an indefinite void,
Where my questions will not meet their worthy answers,
Scared, Terrified and Pettrified at the thought,
Of not being able to hold Baby Koala in my arms.

Once again the waves don't fail me,
They charge and crush my every living being,
Mother once said and she said again,
"Child there is nothing you can do but pray,
Pray and hope you gain."